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Adult Children #Scattered

" Della disconnected the phone after yet another draining conversation with her daughter Crosby.  Crosby is a literary agent in NYC, married to a successful publisher. Crosby frantically juggles her career, their frenetic social obligations and two over-indulged, anxiety ridden children (Della’s grandchildren) leaving very little time for her mother. Della is convinced her daughter makes the obligatory weekly phone call just to have someone to argue with. When Della revealed her plans with Tish and Ann to leave the following week for Sedona in order to spread Bree's ashes, Crosby embarked on a litany of reasons why the trip was a stupid idea for 'three women in their late fifties who have no business riding motorcycles cross country for god sakes.' Her vitriol was damn near palatable across the large chunk of geography between New York and Chicago. Crosby was born willful; straight from the womb she cast dispersion and judgment on Della. And there were times when Della was just bone-weary of her obligations as a mother to her adult children."

In my book #Scattered, the characters Della and Tish struggle with their responsibilities to their adult children. Tish bears the burden of an adult son who committed suicide after spending years locked in his bedroom in Tish's house. He blamed her for divorcing his father. Della struggles with a judgmental daughter and a son lost in denial of his sexuality. Tish is the tender-hearted one who practices unconditional love...no matter what. Della strains under the weight of unconditional love. 

We all have; and if you deny you haven't, I seriously want to hear from you. I don't know a single woman (perhaps men approach their adult children differently - I know my partner Paul does) within my inner circle who has not suffered the heartache of trying to cope with an adult child. Or worse, the anguish of losing their child. Our children hold the power to bring us great joy or unbearable heartache.

When the idea for #Scattered took up residence in my head about seven months ago, I wanted a 'girl-buddy-road-trip-adventure' kind of plot. I created the characters - Della, Bree, Tish, and Ann - by morphing several of my women friends who I have known for twenty years or more. No one character is exactly like someone I know; and yes, if you think I'm writing about you I probably am...as the saying goes!  I love these women and together we have trudged down many roads, seeking answers, seeking refuge, and seeking the acceptance from each other that makes struggling with our adult children so much more bearable. Women's stories need to be told; all the ugly truths, the unsurmountable fears, the tragedies along with the triumphs, the torment and suffering along with the joy. Stories that are so uncomfortable that a writer needs to use fiction...as the truth is sometimes too raw. The stories of my characters in #Scattered are intentional, provocative, and heartbreaking. I hope you come along for the ride.

Debi Tolbert Duggar is the author of 'Riding Soul-O'
Part memoir, part travelogue, part spiritual salvation
Available at Bessieandme.com or online wherever books are sold       


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